Thank you 2 unidentified Gopher fans

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Nelson

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Posts: 272

11/12/08 12:37 AM

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ChinaGopher Member Posts: 250 (10/16/05 3:53 pm) Reply	Thank you 2 unidentified Gopher fans THIS ISN'T NICE!! STOP READING NOW IF YOU WANT SUGAR AND SWEETNESS; Thanks to the two Gopher fans wearing Gold colored sweat shirts who came to my wife's resuce in the restaurant in NE Mpls yesterday when she was accosted and then assaulted by 3 drunken Pig Badger fans (is there any other kind?). I hope you read this board, as I know no other way to express my gratitude. It takes real tough guys to wait til I went to the rest room and then confront a middle age female trying to eat her meal and minding her own business, and attempt to tear off her Goper Sweatshirt. When she told them to get their f@#$&g hands off her one grabbed her by the neck and lifted her up and slammed her back and head against the wall. It was at that point you guys intervened and man oh man, did you. Those guys faces are both seriously scarred and disfigured. It'll take major plastic surgery for them to look anything close to normal; otherwse, they'll spend their lives working the carnival circuit in the freak shows. I added to your work and inflicted some more damage to 2 of their heads and bodies. Hopefully, they'll be blind, and suffer from brain damage and internal bleeding along with your contributions. I owe you guys big time and hope to find you so that I can express my gratitude personally. For the record--before the Manager rushed me out of there to avoid the Cops I asked him to shred you check so there'd be no record of who you are. He did this but without first taking your name and address for me. So your dinner and drinks are on me. Credit the debit in your checkbook. You also have a standing dinner for 4 (anything on the menu plus as many drinks as you and your guests can handle) whenever you want it. Ask for the Manager--he's the one who hustled you guys out via the service elevator to avoid the Cops (We made it out thru the kitchen). He and the family that owns the place are close friends of mine and they'll take care of you. If you want a friend for life you have one If you want to remain unknown to me that's up to you but I hope you guys can at least get that dinner, and more if you want it. Also, the Badger Pukes somehow got off the floor and out of there seconds before the Cops came in so there was no report taken, though they did comment on the large amount of blood on the carpet. All things considered, I guess I'm thankful for the "Wild West" solution. I could have stayed and had them arrested, testified against them, and then sued them. But in this nitwit society in which we live you and I could have wound up being arrested and possibly sued too. I don't usually condone this type of thing but when someone touches (let alone smashes) my wife There is no civilized response in my book. Lucky for them I didn't have a gun because I definitely would have used it (lucky for me too, I guess). My wife has a congenital back problem and could have wound up in a wheel chair. Fortunately she's OK. I took her to Urgent Care last night but she checks out fine. She was badly shaken though, and still is today. So fellas, thanks for standing up and not just attempting to reason with these Red & White C@#$S&$#@s, but doing something that saved an innocent person serious injiury. I'm indebted to you guys forever. I'm spending my Sunday fantasizing about hundreds upon hundreds of drunken Badger slob fans (is there any other kind?) flipping their cars and leaving their Red & White brains all over the freeways (their side of the border, of course). I may come away from that thought in a few days, but not yet!! My last thought on Badger fans are of the 2 other couples in the restaurant who were not with the perpetrators but made no effort to reign them in while there was still time. After I returned and was driving the leg of a chair into one of the eye sockets of one your victims a Badger bystander (the one who called the Cops on a cell phone) screamed at me "it's not fair what you're doing". Didn't have the time to deal with him but wish I could have. It'll be a long time before anybody involved forgets about this incident. Thanks guys for rescuing my beloved. Nothing more to say than if you ever need me, here I am. If you want to contact me go thru the restaurant, not here.
ZTAGOPHER Member Posts: 1322 (10/16/05 4:16 pm) Reply	OMG!!! What pathetic excuses for human beings - Badger fans or not. I cant imagine that kind of crap. I sure am glad you had "assistance" and that you provided to them what they obviously deserved. Thanks to those that assisted - you should be applauded. "I know, I know...cold weather, memories of probation, reputation for medicrity, and G4L as a "fan." Four strikes and you're out, right?"
VarmintCong Member Posts: 135 (10/16/05 4:19 pm) Reply	Re: Thank you 2 unidentified Gopher fans Too bad there weren't any Hmong hunters around to take care of those Badger bastards.
FreakyDeke Member Posts: 42 (10/16/05 4:20 pm) Reply	Re: Thank you 2 unidentified Gopher fans I don't think those guys will have to worry about brain damage
Turbo Action Stealth Gopher Member Posts: 196 (10/16/05 4:25 pm) Reply	Awesome story I always knew Badger fans were shitheads, but this takes the cake. Aside from the part about your wife getting assaulted - what an awesome story!!!! WTG ChinaGopher!!!!!!
ChinaGopher Member Posts: 251 (10/16/05 4:34 pm) Reply	Re: OMG!!! Unfortunately, I didn't provide my "assisters" with even 1/100 of what they deserve. That's why I hope so much to hear from them.
felde Member Posts: 842 (10/16/05 4:39 pm) Reply	Re: Thank you 2 unidentified Gopher fans Rock on, Bronson-style. I would have chipped in if I had been there. Hope you are both alright, China.
Swift County Go4 Member Posts: 141 (10/16/05 4:41 pm) Reply	amazing Also, very bizaare! I had something similar happen to my wife about 10 years ago. Just didn't quite go that far. Some people don't know how to handle a friendly border battle. They are acting like Israel and Palestine.
ChinaGopher Member Posts: 252 (10/16/05 4:52 pm) Reply	Re: Thank you 2 unidentified Gopher fans I know you would have been in there to help, buddy! That's one thing about this board--I think pretty much anyone here would have done what our 2 saviors did regardless of pro or anti Mason feelings, or any other ideological differences. I'm just shocked that something like this could happen in Mpls in 2005. It was like a Los Angeles Gang trying to tear off the colors of a rival crew. Wish I would have had Vic Maki with me. I have to confess that for about 30 seconds (it seemed to be to be about 1 hour) I was back in Viet Nam and my only thought was to make sure neither one of these guys took another breath. I don't see how the hell they got out of there. The first blow our first savior rendered was a half full beer bottle across the face of the Badger assailant that shattered and split the guy open like a melon. There was quite a bit more damage done before my arrival. My contribution consisted of kicks to the head and ribs of each, along with the infamous chair leg effort. Dammit, what a mess. I sure wish it wouldn't have happened but am glad someone was willing to make a stand. Thanks for your concern. We're both doing OK but she's still pretty rattled and I'm still full of adrenaline, as if you couldn't tell.
felde Member Posts: 843 (10/16/05 5:00 pm) Reply	Re: Thank you 2 unidentified Gopher fans Seen leaving the restaurant...
ChinaGopher Member Posts: 253 (10/16/05 5:05 pm) Reply	Re: Thank you 2 unidentified Gopher fans I now look on that Hunter as an innocent victim, and national hero, who was framed by the authorities. I'll be sure to donate to the inevitable committee set up to free him.
Zales04 Member Posts: 545 (10/16/05 5:15 pm) Reply	Re: Thank you 2 unidentified Gopher fans How old were these assholes? If I had been in your situation, I probably would have broken their necks. I don't know that I could refrain from comitting a serious crime like that! "Said Lloyd: 'It's frustrating because it has nothing to do with the ability of our team. It was completely mental.' " - StarTribune 11-14-04
ChinaGopher Member Posts: 254 (10/16/05 5:15 pm) Reply	Re: amazing Hope your spouse didn't/doesn't suffer from any after affects of the incident. I've been meaning to get a hold of you anyway. Was it you who befriended the "Oldtimer?" I know he had an ongoing relationship with someone and thought it was you. When I was in China I sent him an e-mail and offered him my tickets for any game he could get himself up here for. He responded almost immediately and said his "Sweetie's" health prevented that at the time but the prognosis was optimisitic and hoped to take advantage of the offer at some point. About 6 months ago I posted here wondering if anyone had heard from him. I sent him an e-mail asking him if he was OK and requesting that he e-mail me back with the understanding that I wouldn't post anything on the board he didn't want me to. The good news was that my message wasn't rejected thereby letting me know his account still had to be periodically used to remain open. The bad news was that he didn't respond. Have you (or anyone else) had contact with him? I really miss his feistiness and spirit. In many ways he represented what was best about Gopher fans. What loyalty!! If I had only lived here a short time and saw just a few games I highly doubt I would have retained interest all those years. Hoping to hell he's OK and wishing he could get up her for a game at some time. Thanks for your help!! PS: I could just see him in the middle of this skirmish--asking no quarter and giving none. It would have turned out even worse for those jerks had the ex-Navy man been a part of it. Edited by: ChinaGopher at: 10/16/05 5:17 pm
ChinaGopher Member Posts: 255 (10/16/05 5:19 pm) Reply	Re: Thank you 2 unidentified Gopher fans I'm not real good with ages but the two who really caught hell appeared to be about 25, a little older than the average student. I'm a pretty poor judge though. I'm told that the third one kind of vanished when the festivities began. He was very much a part of the incdent and I guess did get hit a couple of times but wasn't hurt like the others. I never saw him. Believe me, I did hurt them and meant to do more. The Manager wanted to get me out of there to avoid the Cops and the hassle of us all going downtown even though we would have eventually prevailed. Probably saved me a man slaughter charge because that's where I was heading. Edited by: ChinaGopher at: 10/16/05 5:25 pm
The Loon Member Posts: 1741 (10/16/05 5:28 pm) Reply	I hope... ...your wife is well and that the attack had no other aspects that are upsetting her. Assure her that we all wish her well and this was all just ugly "demon rum" stuff. Good luck and let it pass.
ChinaGopher Member Posts: 256 (10/16/05 5:32 pm) Reply	Re: I hope... Hard as hell to let it pass, at least for right now. Perhaps, in time. My Wife seems to be OK physically. We'll see in a few days how she is otherwise. Thanks for your concern. In spite of our many prior battles and vicious words your response is exactly what I would expect from you. Thanks again!
pullmangopher Member Posts: 34 (10/16/05 5:40 pm) Reply	Re: Thank you 2 unidentified Gopher fans Wow, what a bunch of savages. I like to see the solidarity between gopher fans, though. Seems like the Logic of Collective Action fails to apply to situations such as this. These gopher fans could have well been free riders at the expense of your wife, but managed to defend your wife and the maroon and gold! Way to go guys!
tikited Member Posts: 17 (10/16/05 5:43 pm) Reply	Re: Thank you 2 unidentified Gopher fans Just for curiosity sake, I went to a Badger board and they don't believe a second of this story. I'm hoping one of their friends shows up to work with only one eye. Maybe then they will believe it.
The Loon Member Posts: 1743 (10/16/05 5:45 pm) Reply	I can not imagine how high your adrenalin must have ... ...gotten. Go see that penguin movie or somesuch. Good luck.
ChinaGopher Member Posts: 257 (10/16/05 5:45 pm) Reply	Re: Thank you 2 unidentified Gopher fans This is just a guess on my part but I believe these guys would have responded in the same manner if the assailants had been dressed in Tuxedos and my wife was wearing a ball room gown. The fact that both they and my wife were clad in Gopher attire does make it sweet though, and does raise the possibility of it being strictly a bonding response.
VarmintCong Member Posts: 137 (10/16/05 5:55 pm) Reply	Of course Wisconsinites deny it happened! Those drunks never think they do anything wrong. Makes it hard to muster up too much sympathy for the bus crash over there today.

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BtotheArthur

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Posts: 231

11/12/08 2:09 AM

Thank you for being a friend

Well, at least our friend ChinaGopher got one thing right...It'll be a long time before anyone forgets about this.

He was very intense and manical. I thought he was going to put a cap in my ass. - Check For Bees' thoughts on Mike Leckrone

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BuckyTuba

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Posts: 358

11/12/08 4:10 AM

"Credit the debit in your checkbook"

I'm sitting at work, 5:10am... just laughing my ass off at this story.

"I'd almost say she's major leagues, and I'm brad nelson but I'm gonna keep trying no matter how bad I make my career look"

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DoorCountyBadgers

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Posts: 2556

11/12/08 6:56 AM

HOCKEYMANIAC

ITS A GREAT DAY FOR HOCKEY

“Support Hockey. Any Location, Any Time, Any Level, Any Gender. For some it's a game, for others a sport - for me, it's something more�?

"Be original, be different, be passionate, be selfless and be free. Be a hockey fan."

“Wisconsin Badger Hockey: NCAA Champions 1973, 1977, 1981, 1983, 1990, 2006�?

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fortheloveofweeks.brewersfandemonium

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Posts: 456

11/12/08 7:31 AM

Wow, my brother came back from this game with only one eye. It all makes sense now!

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RabbiBucky

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Posts: 916

11/12/08 7:37 AM

Is China Gopher really Timmie Brewster? Now it all fits.

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Badger inohiovalley

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Posts: 857

11/12/08 8:54 AM

The best part is not the story, but the long line of idiots who BELIEVED HIM! I posted in the original thread three years ago on Gopherhole, and it was PAGES long. The number of morons who actually believed it was hilarious. I can remember a steady stream of Badger fans interjecting, pointing out the absurdity of a beatdown, complete with huge pools of blood, and escape elevator shaft, a "non" police report, and two badly disfigured guys getting up from the floor just in time to avoid a police report.

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"It is official - this is a rebuilding year." - St. Bucky a.k.a., The Seer, re: The Wisconsin Badgers Basketball Team, 12/8/07

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RedWagon

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Posts: 2177

11/12/08 9:01 AM

I don't know the answer, I'm just asking that's all.

Badger inohiovalley wrote:
The best part is not the story, but the long line of idiots who BELIEVED HIM!

That part always made me laugh too. Then they hired Punky Brewster and he started selling his snake oil, and they believed his B.S. too. Now I just find it frightening that the only thing that separates the 2 states is a navigable river. Thankfully, I live on the east side of Wisconsin.

"Not to mention I defend things that are absolutely ignorant"
MrLogic - 5/7/07

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bielemaniac

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Posts: 1015

11/12/08 9:37 AM

Morris Wanchuk

A classic! I never get tired of reading this.

"Frankly I don't care if I make a fool out of myself on this board. In some aspects of life, sure. But in a place where everyone thinks I am a fool anyway and that view is unlikely to change, I'm not so concerned." - Sour1729

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Timster96

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Posts: 3443

11/12/08 9:57 AM

Loudmouth Bastard

"Cold pizza is for assholes. If the delivery guy brought it cold, you'd kick him in the fucking nuts."

That thread was the best thing that ever happened to me on the internet. The guy kept providing more details, so finally I told him I was contacting the local police. I mean, how many restaurants would they have been called to that Saturday night to find only blood strewn about, a chair leg half dipped in Badger blood and not one of the participants to be found? Surely, they could get to the bottom of this, arrest the restaurant owner for obstruction of justice, reach China Gopher and get a full report. Justice must be served! Certainly, we all have a responsibility to report criminal activity.

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BKBucky

#10

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Posts: 1920

11/12/08 11:24 AM

Let Your Feet Stomp

"THIS ISN'T NICE!! STOP READING NOW IF YOU WANT SUGAR AND SWEETNESS"

What a great opening line. God I love that.

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staffm

#11

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Posts: 248

11/12/08 11:36 AM

Hard to believe it was THREE years ago. Seems like yesterday. Fan (?!?) needs to be in a creative writing class or is in one already !!!!

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TristansShadow

#12

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Posts: 3006

11/12/08 12:04 PM

Chef Ameche

The undisputed heavy weight champ, always will be.

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Badger inohiovalley

#13

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Posts: 858

11/12/08 1:54 PM

Timster, I remember you in that thread. There were a few of us. I lament not having the subsequent pages. Numerous Badger fans were poking holes in the story, only to have idiot Gopher fans defending it. The thread in it's entire form was much better than this simple first page.

How about the fact that he had to take his wife to the hospital for her back? Anytime a woman enters a hospital with injuries like the ones they describe, there is no way on earth they aren't informing the police.

Gotta love ChinaGopher and others wishing a Hmong hunter was around. Or that the bus accident in Wisconsin was suddenly a good thing.

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"It is official - this is a rebuilding year." - St. Bucky a.k.a., The Seer, re: The Wisconsin Badgers Basketball Team, 12/8/07

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Bucky312

#14

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Posts: 323

11/12/08 1:57 PM

Can we just send this to the Hall of Fame board the minute the Minny game is over. I'd like to know where it is to trot it out for years to come! LOL!

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Old Uncle C

Never...

#15

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Posts: 491

11/12/08 1:58 PM

Smoove C

...gets...old. Ever.

On, Wisconsin!

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ssbadger

#16

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Posts: 191

11/12/08 2:51 PM

"Thanks to the two Gopher fans wearing Gold colored sweat shirts"

Such detail, those gold sweatshirts are great identifying characteristics. I've read this dozens of times and pick up something new each time. Hilarious!

"If this isn't nice, I don't know what is." Kurt Vonnegut

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MT24

#17

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Posts: 1209

11/12/08 3:57 PM

That baby is a classic. Had tears coming out from laughing so hard the first time I read it and it hasn't lost its' appeal! The best were the Badger fans posting there mocking ChinaGopher and his defenders.

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RedWagon

#18

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Posts: 2183

11/12/08 3:59 PM

I don't know the answer, I'm just asking that's all.

ssbadger wrote:
I've read this dozens of times and pick up something new each time. Hilarious!

If you squint, it almost looks like Bronson is wearing gold and maroon too.

Every time this is posted I have to read it like 3 times. It's just unbelievably hilarious.

"Not to mention I defend things that are absolutely ignorant"
MrLogic - 5/7/07

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TristansShadow

#19

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Posts: 3008

11/12/08 4:16 PM

Chef Ameche

Some memories of the thread since we don't seem to have the back end of it:

When pressed China moved the location of the restaurant with the combo elevator shaft / escape hatch from the NE to the SW to eventually "undisclosed" part of the Twin City area.

When pressed by Timster about the details, China recanted on the specific health care facility that took care of his wife.

Eventually China cursed and left. I wonder what his handle is now. Perhaps Ruppert?

And how could I forget: the distinction between pressing / placing the chair leg in the eye socket.

Last Edited By: TristansShadow 11/12/08 4:18 PM. Edited 1 time.

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Badger inohiovalley

#20

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Posts: 859

11/12/08 4:51 PM

TristansShadow wrote:

And how could I forget: the distinction between pressing / placing the chair leg in the eye socket.

That "distinction" was hilarious!

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"It is official - this is a rebuilding year." - St. Bucky a.k.a., The Seer, re: The Wisconsin Badgers Basketball Team, 12/8/07

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Thank you 2 unidentified Gopher fans

Thank you 2 unidentified Gopher fans

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